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In-Box humor
EDI[T9 In-Box Humor N Y O N E CAN E M P A T H I Z E with W o r d s worth's observation "the world is too much with u s . . . " For those with any 9level of administrative responsibility, we further find the In-Box is too much with us. It is not really to be trusted. Overnight it reproduces the paper it contains. What was a nearly empty box at 5 o'clock seems to be full to running over in the morning. Having been reared to believe I that there were elves who came to help the cobbler fix his shoes for an early morning deadline, I await the helpful In-Box elves who never show up, unless of course they have their assignment confused and make work. The In-Box seems to take on human characteristics. Some days it positi,(ely frowns. How then to view it with even a tad of humor? Perhaps as administrators we shouldn't take ourselves quke so seriously; therefore, I pose some not-so-grim thoughts.
administrative amnesty? O t h e r organizations and agencies employ it. There may be one day at the library when everyone can bring back overdue library books and the fine is forgiven. Recently, I read of an agency that was granting amnesty to persons with delinquent taxes, albeit with new and stiffer penalties once the amnesty period had expired. Even the immigration service grants amnesty. So why not each of us doing so in our organization? On Administrative Amnesty Day, all obligations will be null and void. Those papers lurking in the 9I n - b 0 x marked "deadline" and "urgent" could be ignored. Amnesty. Forgiven. Null and void. All those above you in the administrative hierarchy would for" give any outstanding paper debts, such as letters, memos, calls, and negative reports. _All those below you will be forgiven by you. And we will all begin afresh.
Wrong Way Arrows Being a naive creature I thought the administrator sent out work for others to do, delegated, and waited to reap the organizational harvest. Wrong. In fact I would observe that the assignment arrows are pointed the wrong way. The office often seems like a shipping company that should have one window for "deliveries" and the other for "dispatching." It doesn't take long, however, to figure out that all through the day your colleagues are "delivering" assignments for you tO dol 9There are times it seems that all you can do is stack them into a neat pile rather than read them carefully, deliberately, and choose a responsible action or answer. Careful reading and decision making 9 "after hours," and hopefully, by morning, the stack to be "dispatched" has grown.
Administrative Amnesty A fellow administrator shared with me somet!ling I think we should employ immediately. What about
Journal of ProfessionalNursing, Vol
Take a Number On difficult days it seems as though people waiting 9 to see you almost literally stack up in the waiting room. On a particular harried day, my only silent 9 giggle was to deduce that perhaps we should run our office like a b.akery where the customer takes a number and awaits his or her turn for service. Enter a staff member "in full sail." On taking a number she notes it is number 83. On inspection she notes that the administrator is still struggling with number 64 and the hope for "instant crisis intervention" will not be forthcoming. After a few moments repose on the sofa in the waiting room, the staff member's vital signs return to normal 9and in this more tranquil state she begins problem solving. Not trusting how long the waiting time might be, she selects the best of her options and exits to implement it. Without a doubt her judgement will prove to be the best in the long run, in view of herexpertise and experience.
6, No 2 (March-April), 1990: pp 65-67
65
66
LAUREL ARCHER COPP
Pester Principle A friend of mine shares with me one of her many effective administrative skills. For some situations and with some select people who fail to communicate or follow through, she uses the "Pester Principle." it means an investment of time but no doubt produces a wall papered with while-you-were-out pink slips nagging the individual to return the call. It also is saying "face the issue," or "make a decision," or "meet your deadlines," or "please don't hide or go silent on me." The major drawback of thisadministrative technique is that some beloved colleague is also free to use it on you, and may be doing so even as you read.
The Put-Upon Quotient
Whereas all administrators are put-upon (that is what they get paid for), there are those days we FEEL put-upon. Our faces are drawn. W e look through our colleagues in the corridors and never realize it. When someone rings out a cheery good-morning we may b_e so far gone we retort, at least mentally, "And what do you mean by that?" When someone tells us to smile or cheer-up, a little voice in the brain says, "If you only knew what was on my mind you wouldn't say that." Yes, we seem determined to be miserable. W e have earned it. But those we work with can read us almost like a barometer. They understand we feel put-upon. They can even calculate how high the put-upon quotient may be this day. They exhibit administrative genius by comforting, kidding, listening, giving us silent support, and tolerating us.
Elevators
There is an administrative glaze that comes over the eyes that can only be recognized by others of equal preoccupation. Administrators walk about in this dazed state and their safety cannot really be guaranteed. I confess an example herein. On entering an elevator in a large, rambling, medical center, it appeared as though there were surely more buttons than floors in the building. Decision time? I was confronted with these button choices:-1, 2, GR, 3, IR4, 2R, 5, 3, 4, and 4R. Since my feet had walked on solid ground into the building and I
wasn't in England, ! assumed I was on the first floor. Since I wanted to go to the second floor, I pressed button "2." That seemed simple and straightforward enough. The elevator went down! Getting off I searched the corridors to find t h e patient's room but there were only labs. Only gradually did I realize I was underground. I put on my I-know-where-I-am-going face and once again called the car to come and rescue me. Those on the elevator watched with that special elevator behavior of studied disinterest to see which button I was going to press. Where to go seemed less important than to try and get back to where I had begun. By following who appeared to be the least sophisticated visitor out of the car at " G R " I accomplished my goal. I put my hand over my name-pin and unintentionally obstructed persons running to catch the elevator before the doors closed, as I studied the numbers overhead with the focus of a statistician. W h y was "3" before "1" and "2"? W h y was "5" before "3" and "4"? Seeking the second floor I pressed "2R"; the car stopped but the door would not open. A cool draft made my giant brain deduce the rear door was standing open, the elevator patiently; waiting for me to about face and exit. Feeling foolish I muttered "sorry" to an empty elevator, and exited. There I found myself in an entirely different building from that which I had entered. After finding a stairwell I went outdoors and studied the structure of the buildings. Yes, they appeared to be of different heights and not quite adjacent. Obviously, they had been built in different years. I nicknamed one Hill and the other Burton. My next strategy was to push each button and explore the premises until I could find my way without a keeper. That I accomplished, but never mastered the logic of the numbering system. I began to understand the profound wisdom of dropping bread crumbs to mark one's trail. Evidently looking somewhat pathetic, I bowed to the inevitable and asked a young woman if she could direct me to the school of nursing. She smiled agreeably and said, "Certainly, I'm going there myself because this is my first day as a student of nursing. Stick with me, Dean!"
Administrative Swans
The "battered administrator syndrome" has been written about, seriously and humorously. While each
67
IN-BOX HUMOR
of us has an ego ideal, administratively, some days it is difficult to look serene under harrassment. Those were my thoughts while vacationing in Stratford and looking at the swans on the Avon River. From some distance away, the scene was almost too tranquil, too serene, and the swans too stately to look real. It was 9 the essence of a Constable painting. But a second look showed great turmoil. The tranquil moment was invaded by the realities of stress and environmental endangerment. Discarded detergent swathed the river with suds. The elegance of the feather-perfect bodies was directed from below by
powerful, wildly paddling, sinewy legs and thrashing feet. The lovely creatures were in danger of drowning from the oil coating their feathers. On any work day, we fight person-made verbal and interpersonal environmental pollution. But as w e thrash wildly below water level, we administrative swans need to retain our important self-image of dignit}, and control. H u m o r is one approach.
LAURELARCHERCOl'P, RN, PHD, FAAN Editor
administrative amnesty? O t h e r organizations and agencies employ it. There may be one day at the library when everyone can bring back overdue library books and the fine is forgiven. Recently, I read of an agency that was granting amnesty to persons with delinquent taxes, albeit with new and stiffer penalties once the amnesty period had expired. Even the immigration service grants amnesty. So why not each of us doing so in our organization? On Administrative Amnesty Day, all obligations will be null and void. Those papers lurking in the 9I n - b 0 x marked "deadline" and "urgent" could be ignored. Amnesty. Forgiven. Null and void. All those above you in the administrative hierarchy would for" give any outstanding paper debts, such as letters, memos, calls, and negative reports. _All those below you will be forgiven by you. And we will all begin afresh.
Wrong Way Arrows Being a naive creature I thought the administrator sent out work for others to do, delegated, and waited to reap the organizational harvest. Wrong. In fact I would observe that the assignment arrows are pointed the wrong way. The office often seems like a shipping company that should have one window for "deliveries" and the other for "dispatching." It doesn't take long, however, to figure out that all through the day your colleagues are "delivering" assignments for you tO dol 9There are times it seems that all you can do is stack them into a neat pile rather than read them carefully, deliberately, and choose a responsible action or answer. Careful reading and decision making 9 "after hours," and hopefully, by morning, the stack to be "dispatched" has grown.
Administrative Amnesty A fellow administrator shared with me somet!ling I think we should employ immediately. What about
Journal of ProfessionalNursing, Vol
Take a Number On difficult days it seems as though people waiting 9 to see you almost literally stack up in the waiting room. On a particular harried day, my only silent 9 giggle was to deduce that perhaps we should run our office like a b.akery where the customer takes a number and awaits his or her turn for service. Enter a staff member "in full sail." On taking a number she notes it is number 83. On inspection she notes that the administrator is still struggling with number 64 and the hope for "instant crisis intervention" will not be forthcoming. After a few moments repose on the sofa in the waiting room, the staff member's vital signs return to normal 9and in this more tranquil state she begins problem solving. Not trusting how long the waiting time might be, she selects the best of her options and exits to implement it. Without a doubt her judgement will prove to be the best in the long run, in view of herexpertise and experience.
6, No 2 (March-April), 1990: pp 65-67
65
66
LAUREL ARCHER COPP
Pester Principle A friend of mine shares with me one of her many effective administrative skills. For some situations and with some select people who fail to communicate or follow through, she uses the "Pester Principle." it means an investment of time but no doubt produces a wall papered with while-you-were-out pink slips nagging the individual to return the call. It also is saying "face the issue," or "make a decision," or "meet your deadlines," or "please don't hide or go silent on me." The major drawback of thisadministrative technique is that some beloved colleague is also free to use it on you, and may be doing so even as you read.
The Put-Upon Quotient
Whereas all administrators are put-upon (that is what they get paid for), there are those days we FEEL put-upon. Our faces are drawn. W e look through our colleagues in the corridors and never realize it. When someone rings out a cheery good-morning we may b_e so far gone we retort, at least mentally, "And what do you mean by that?" When someone tells us to smile or cheer-up, a little voice in the brain says, "If you only knew what was on my mind you wouldn't say that." Yes, we seem determined to be miserable. W e have earned it. But those we work with can read us almost like a barometer. They understand we feel put-upon. They can even calculate how high the put-upon quotient may be this day. They exhibit administrative genius by comforting, kidding, listening, giving us silent support, and tolerating us.
Elevators
There is an administrative glaze that comes over the eyes that can only be recognized by others of equal preoccupation. Administrators walk about in this dazed state and their safety cannot really be guaranteed. I confess an example herein. On entering an elevator in a large, rambling, medical center, it appeared as though there were surely more buttons than floors in the building. Decision time? I was confronted with these button choices:-1, 2, GR, 3, IR4, 2R, 5, 3, 4, and 4R. Since my feet had walked on solid ground into the building and I
wasn't in England, ! assumed I was on the first floor. Since I wanted to go to the second floor, I pressed button "2." That seemed simple and straightforward enough. The elevator went down! Getting off I searched the corridors to find t h e patient's room but there were only labs. Only gradually did I realize I was underground. I put on my I-know-where-I-am-going face and once again called the car to come and rescue me. Those on the elevator watched with that special elevator behavior of studied disinterest to see which button I was going to press. Where to go seemed less important than to try and get back to where I had begun. By following who appeared to be the least sophisticated visitor out of the car at " G R " I accomplished my goal. I put my hand over my name-pin and unintentionally obstructed persons running to catch the elevator before the doors closed, as I studied the numbers overhead with the focus of a statistician. W h y was "3" before "1" and "2"? W h y was "5" before "3" and "4"? Seeking the second floor I pressed "2R"; the car stopped but the door would not open. A cool draft made my giant brain deduce the rear door was standing open, the elevator patiently; waiting for me to about face and exit. Feeling foolish I muttered "sorry" to an empty elevator, and exited. There I found myself in an entirely different building from that which I had entered. After finding a stairwell I went outdoors and studied the structure of the buildings. Yes, they appeared to be of different heights and not quite adjacent. Obviously, they had been built in different years. I nicknamed one Hill and the other Burton. My next strategy was to push each button and explore the premises until I could find my way without a keeper. That I accomplished, but never mastered the logic of the numbering system. I began to understand the profound wisdom of dropping bread crumbs to mark one's trail. Evidently looking somewhat pathetic, I bowed to the inevitable and asked a young woman if she could direct me to the school of nursing. She smiled agreeably and said, "Certainly, I'm going there myself because this is my first day as a student of nursing. Stick with me, Dean!"
Administrative Swans
The "battered administrator syndrome" has been written about, seriously and humorously. While each
67
IN-BOX HUMOR
of us has an ego ideal, administratively, some days it is difficult to look serene under harrassment. Those were my thoughts while vacationing in Stratford and looking at the swans on the Avon River. From some distance away, the scene was almost too tranquil, too serene, and the swans too stately to look real. It was 9 the essence of a Constable painting. But a second look showed great turmoil. The tranquil moment was invaded by the realities of stress and environmental endangerment. Discarded detergent swathed the river with suds. The elegance of the feather-perfect bodies was directed from below by
powerful, wildly paddling, sinewy legs and thrashing feet. The lovely creatures were in danger of drowning from the oil coating their feathers. On any work day, we fight person-made verbal and interpersonal environmental pollution. But as w e thrash wildly below water level, we administrative swans need to retain our important self-image of dignit}, and control. H u m o r is one approach.
LAURELARCHERCOl'P, RN, PHD, FAAN Editor