Interethnic dating

Inrrmar/onol Journdof hrw~ulrurol Rehons. Printed in the USA. All rights reserved.

Vol.

6. pp.

I IS-126

INTERETHNIC

1982

0147.1767,82;020115-12103.00~0 Copyright 0 1982 Pergamon Press Ltd

DATING

Reasons For and Against

PHILIP E. LAMPE Incarnate Word College San Antonio, Texas A BSTRA CT A study was conducted among Black, Mexican American and Anglo col!ege students to determine the subjective reasons involved in the decision to engage in interethnic dating. Results indicated that reasons for dating someone of another ethnicgroup were similar to those which are common to intraethnic dating. However, many of the reasons against such dating appeared to be very dtfferent. Overall, it appears that reasons for intergroup dating can be best explained normatively while reasons against intergroup dating are best understood structurally.

Intra-group dating and marriage has generally been promoted and encouraged while inter-group dating and marriage has been discouraged and sometimes forbidden. As a result, all intermarriage between members of different racial, religious, or ethnic groups has been relatively rare in the United States (Burma, 1963). Consequently, intimate networks of social relationships between members of each group and more secondary relationships between members of different groups have become established in our social system. Changes in the incidence of interracial or interethnic dating and marriage should therefore be of great interest to a wide variety of social scientists. Any marked increase would have social, psychological, economic, and, possibly, political repercussions. Ethnically homogeneous marriages are still favored in the United States. Mate selection is relatively open, however, and is usually accomplished through the dating process. Results of studies and surveys carried out over the last several decades have indicated modest increases in interracial and interethnic marriage (Schaefer, 1979; Heer, 1974). Fewer studies appear to have been concerned with the related area of the possibly changing rates of interracial or interethnic dating. What data are Requests Division Incarnate

for reprints should be sent to Philip E. Lampe, PH.D.. Sociology Department, of Social Science, Business Administration, and Multidisciplinary Studies, Word College, San Antonio,

Texas 78209.

116

Philip E. L.ampe

available indicate that most young people have a favorable attitude toward such behavior (Gallup, 1978) and that an increasing number are putting their beliefs into practice by dating outside of their own groups (Lampe, 1981; Downs, 1971). There are, of course, many reasons, both objective and subjective, which account for these changes. Some of the objective reasons which have been noted include the importance given to the values of romantic love and democracy in American culture (Merton, 1941) and the cultural emphasis on individual happiness rather than group responsibility, together with our greater social and physical mobility (Barron, 1971). These cultural variables are not, however, uniformly present among all segments of the population; subcultural differences exist which often coincide with ethnic differences. This may be understood by referring to van den Berghe (1967) who has explained how structural pluralism promotes cultural pluralism. Since the 1954 Supreme Court decision which prohibited the continuation of school segregation, a series of events, including civil rights legislation and affirmative action programs, have brought about greater opportunities for interracial and interethnic contact. At the time of the Court’s decision some people expressed concern that widespread interdating and marriage would result. Such has not been the case. The personal motives involved in the decision whether or not an individual will go outside his/ her own racial or ethnic group are unknown. Studies of the subjective reasons for and against such dating and marriage have been virtually ignored (Duberman, 1974). It is probably safe to say, however, that most of the same motives which enter into a decision of who the individual dates or does not date within his/ her own group will also apply to decisions of dating outside the group. Presently in the United States marriage is based on the ideal of romantic love and, therefore, the most commonly accepted reason for dating would appear to be emotional attraction. At the same time, however, it has been found repeatedly that propinquity, especially residential and occupational, is an important variable in mate selection (Bell, 1967: pp. 139-142). Thus, it appears that the development of emotional attraction is generally dependent upon nearness. Since there is still a great deal of physical and social separation between racial or ethnic groups, many members of each group have but limited or highly structured contact with members of the other ethnic groups. This situation may result in at least two possible negative responses as regards interethnic dating: a lack of interethnic dating due to lack of opportunity, and/or a lack of desire to interdate due to lack of knowledge and understanding. A further consequence may be perception of exogamous marriage as being especially divorce-prone and, therefore, a refusal to even consider such dating and possible marriage.

Interethnic

Dating

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The present study was conducted to determine the following pertinent attitudes and beliefs: 1. What are the principal motives which lead one to date outside his/ her own ethnic group? 2. What are the principal reasons which impede such dating? 3. Would more people like to engage in such dating than actually do? 4. What effect, if any, does such dating have on attitudes of those who engage in it? 5. How divorce-prone are exogamous marriages perceived to be? 6. How willing are respondents to consider such marriages? Answers to the preceding questions are important to aid in understanding what is presently occurring in interethnic interpersonal relations, and to predict what may be expected to occur in the future.

METHODOLOGY In order to obtain the desired information a questionnaire was designed and pretested. The final instrument was administered to 251 students attending a state college and a private college in San Antonio, Texas. A purposive sample was used consisting of students who were members of classes and school organizations which were selected for their sex and/ or ethnic composition. Selections were made so as to achieve the desired proportions of male-female and Black-Mexican American-Anglo respondents. College students were utilized in the study for two important reasons: first, results can be compared to other studies of college dating, and second, given the generally segregated nature of residental communities, college offers most individuals the first real opportunity to date interethnically. Students not only come into contact with members of other ethnic groups on a common level and with similar interests but they are older and relatively freer of community pressures and taboos. The instrument, which was anonymously answered, was composed of four parts. The first part requested personal data, including age, sex, religion, birth order, occupation of parents, and ethnic background of father and mother. Three remaining parts were identical except for a change in the ethnic groups (Black, Mexican American, Anglo) about which information was requested. Respondents were instructed to answer the items in all parts except that which pertained to his/ her own ethnic group. All three parts contained the following items: 1. Have you ever dated a (Black, Mexican American, Anglo)? 2. If you have dated a (Black, Mexican American, Anglo) what were your principal reasons for doing so at the time? 3. If you have dated a (Black, Mexican American, Anglo) have any of your previous beliefs or attitudes changed concerning (Blacks, Mexican Americans, Angles)?

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Philip E. Lumpe

4. In general,

5. 6. 7. 8.

are your attitudes toward them now: more positive, more negative, the same? If you have not dated a (Black, Mexican American, Anglo) what are your principal reasons for not doing so? Would you like to date a (Black, Mexican American, Anglo)? Would you consider marrying a (Black, Mexican American, Anglo)? Comparing interracial/interethnic marriages to marriages between two people of the same race/ethnicity, do you believe interracial/ interethnic marriages have: more divorce. less divorce, same amount of divorce?

RESULTS The ethnic composition of the 251 respondents was 99 Mexican Americans, 89 Anglos and 63 Blacks. Results revealed that a majority of respondents from all three ethnic groups and both sexes indicated the principal motive for dating someone of another ethnic group was a personal liking for the individual. This was followed by such considerations as sexual reasons, curiosity, and to have a date, none of which were mentioned by more than 16% of any category of respondents. It is of interest to note that although not given as a common reason, “to prove a lack of prejudice” was only mentioned when Blacks were involved. See Table I for complete results. Reasons against dating members of other ethnic groups were much more diverse and no single reason was given by a majority of respondents of any group. The most commonly cited reason given by both males and females was a lack of desire. Table 2 shows that the three most common reasons given by Mexican Americans were “don’t know any well enough,” “no desire,” and “no chance.” Blacks indicated the three most common reasons were “no desire,” “hadn’t thought of it,” and “no chance,” while Anglos indicated “no desire,” “don’t know any well enough,” and “no chance.” In general, social pressures and attitudes of parents and friends appear to have deterred females from interethnic dating more than they have males. A majority of all the respondents, 64yc, have dated interethnically. Comparing ethnic groups, Mexican Americans were involved in the most, Blacks the least amount of interethnic dating. Of those who had not dated outside their own group, 58Ye said they would like to date someone of one of the other two ethnic groups. Most respondents who had engaged in interethnic dating did not feel the experience had caused any change of attitudes toward members of the other ethnic group. The majority of those who indicated some change of attitude had occurred said the change had been in a positive direction.

aSome columns

Curiosity Sexual Like the person Unprejudiced Personal gain Have date Others did Not sure

Reasons 4% 3% 84% 0% 3% 5% 0% 1%

w/Angles 4% 12% 64% 0% a% 4% 4% 4%

9%a 9% 57% 9% 4% 13% 0% 0%

w/Angles

Blacks w/Mex. Am.

do not add up to 100% due to rounding.

4%a 7% 78% 4% 4% 4% 0% 0%

w/Blacks

Mexican Americans

Reasons for Interethnic Dating by Ethnic Group

TABLE 1

2% 12% 86% 0% 0% 0% 0% 0%

w/Mex. Am.

Anglos

16% 4% 64% 12% 0% 0% 4% 0%

w/Blacks

Y)

:

aSome columns

22voa 3% 15% 15% 4% 4% 12% 12% 12%

w/Blacks 21%a 4% 0% 21% 0% 4% 36% 4% a%

w/Angles 30% 0% 3% 19% 0% 0% 1 1% 32% 5%

34% a 5% 3% 24% 0% 0% a% 16% 11%

w/Angles

Blacks w/Mex. Am.

do not add up to 100% due to rounding.

No desire Social pressure Parents and friends No chance Afraid to go Feel it’s wrong Don’t know any well Hadn’t thought of it Feel uncomfortable

Reasons

Mexican Americans

Reasons Against Interethnic Dating by Ethnic Group

TABLE 2

24% 4% 6% 1a% 0% 7% 26% 7% a%

w/Mex. Am.

Anglos

28% 5% 7% 14% 0% 7% 17% 9% 13%

w/Blacks

E 2a

2 z 5’

aSome columns

Mexican

15% 3% 82% 82% 18% a2%a 16% 12%a 14% 73%

41%a 3% 57%

47% 53%

40% 60%

21% 13% 66%

4% 32% 64%

37% 63%

57% 43%

25% 0% 75%

10% 33% 57%

41% 59%

56% 44%

19%a 15% 65O/6

66% 34%

59% 41%

46% 4% 50%

170/ba 17% 67%

Anglos Am.

44% 56%

w/Mex.

17% 03%

w/Angles

Blacks Am.

21% 79%

w/Mex.

do not add up to 100°/b due to rounding.

15% 05%

w/Angles

Americans

24% 76%

w/Blacks

Beliefs changed Yes No Attitudes now More positive More negative Same Would like to date Yes No Would consider marriage Yes No Intermarriage has More divorce Less divorce Same amount

Items

Percent Responding to Various Items by Ethnic Group

TABLE 3

37%a 19% 43%

27% 73%

35% 65%

31% 0% 69%

37% 63%

w/Blacks

122

Philip E. Lampe

Among Black respondents, however, attitudinal changes due to dating experience with Anglos was not as uniformly positive. As many Blacks reported a negative change in attitudes as those who reported a positive change. A majority of respondents from each group indicated they believed interethnic marriages had the same chance of ending in divorce as intraethnic marriages, except for Anglo respondents referring to intermarriage with Blacks. In the latter case a plurality, 43%, answered that such a marriage had the same chance as any other marriage, but 37% believed it had less of a chance to endure. Overall, 50% of the respondents revealed they would consider marrying someone of one of the other ethnic groups, but the responses differed in relation to specific ethnic combinations. There was, in general, a mutual unwillingness to intermarry found between most Blacks and Mexican Americans or Anglos. However, over half of the Mexican American and Anglo respondents indicated a mutual willingness to marry each other. DISCUSSION

AND

CONCLUSION

Data indicate that reasons for dating someone of another ethnic group are similar to those which obtain in dating within one’s own ethnic group. However, reasons which impede or deter interethnic dating appear to be very different from those that are common to intraethnic dating. The former can probably be best explained normatively while the latter appears to be best understood structurally. In a 1970 study of male college students, it was found that the most common motives for dating were: “to find a female friend,” “recreation,” Almost three-fourths of the respondents and “for sexual intimacy.” included sexual intimacy in their first three reasons. Less than 6% of the respondents listed mate selection as their primary motive for dating (Vreeland, 1972). This may be seen as a verification of the contention that dating is not to be viewed primarily as courting, and does not necessarily involve mate selection. The preceding reasons are very similar to those mentioned most often in the present study of interethnic dating. All three of these reasons are consistent with the general expectations of contemporary society or, at least, the younger segment of it. Mate selection is expected to be based on emotional attraction. This attraction is not only viewed by many as an acceptable motivation but also as an acceptable justification. It is often used to explain as well as defend behavior which is viewed by others as questionable or objectionable. Thus, it is relevant to interethnic dating. In addition, the United States has what the Francoeurs (1977) call a “hot sex culture.” Such a culture is obsessed with sexual intercourse. A recent spate of books and articles have convinced many Americans that

Interethnic Dating

123

to have and enjoy sexual freedom is not only their right but also their obligation. The culmination of such perceived expectations is evident in a letter of a teenage girl who in 1979 wrote to advice columnist Ann Landers asking if there was an operation or medical procedure available which could “help” her so no one would ever be able to tell that she was still a virgin. The teenager was concerned about what a boy with whom she may become intimate would think of her if he discovered her secret. Part of the new sexual freedom is an emphasis on new experiences and experimentations. This, when coupled with a spirit of liberation from past sexual mores, can lead some to seek what was once the “forbidden love” of interracial or interethnic partners. A sexual motivation for interracial dating was widely assumed by the respondents in an earlier study reported by Petroni (1971). Because of the broadly disseminated nature of these norms, they would be expected to be influential, to some degree, in the dating behavior of members of the three ethnic groups under consideration. Hence, the above norms, together with the more idealized American values of personal freedom and racial equality, when taken seriously, can be used to explain most of the present data. One reason mentioned which is probably unique to intergroup dating is curiosity. It is the result of structural separation and, possibly, a testing of stereotypes. This is especially evident in the case of Anglos who are generally more structurally separated from Blacks than Mexican Americans. As a consequence, they indicated both “curiosity” and “to prove a lack of prejudice” as reasons for dating Blacks significantly more often than they did for dating Mexican Americans. Reasons for not dating interethnically were very different from those that might be expected in intraethnic dating. The most common reason cited was “lack of desire.” Although this reason may be heard regarding intraethnic dating as well, it would be directed against one or another individual for personal reasons. In this case, however, it is directed against a whole group of individuals for impersonal reasons. This seems to reflect the effects of socialization and social structure. Socialization conditions people to restrict their dating partners through development of criteria governing such variables as beauty, desirability, etc., and feelings of prejudice. Social structure also plays an important part. in development of prejudice by setting the stage for intergroup relations conducive to economic competition and exploitation, as well as preparing the conditions for certain groups to be viewed as viable scapegoats (see McLemore, 1980, pp. 105-124). Social structure plays an even greater part in conditioning some of the other responses, such as “no chance,” “don’t know any well enough,” “hadn’t thought of it,” and “would feel uncomfortable.” These are more directly related to the structural separation imposed by society. All of the

124

Philip E. Lampe

preceding reasons were cited by members of the three ethnic groups in relation to the other two. Additional reasons expressed by some of the respondents included “opposition of parents and friends,” “feel it is wrong,” and “afraid to go.” Some of these same reasons were heard by interviewers in an earlier study of Black and White youth who were questioned about interracial dating (Petroni, 1971). Reasons against interethnic dating may be grouped into three main categories: (1) lack of contact (“no chance,” “don’t know any well”); (2) lack of interest (“no desire,” “ hadn’t thought of it”); and (3) lack of acceptance (“social pressure,” “parents and friends,” “afraid to go,” “feel it’s wrong,” “ feel uncomfortable”). In this way it appears that lack of contact impedes Anglos and Mexican Americans from interdating most often, whereas lack of interest is most frequently involved in limiting the amount of Black interethnic dating. Lack of acceptance presents, overall, the weakest barrier to interdating between the three groups. When it is a reason, it generally explains why Anglos and Mexican Americans do not date Blacks rather than each other. Conversely, it appears to have little direct personal affect on Blacks. Thus, it can be seen that subjective reasons are affected by and may be reinterpreted as objective reasons. For example, while objectively Blacks have generally been more structurally separated from the rest of society than have Mexican Americans or Anglos, it is the two latter groups who have been more subjectively aware of their separation as a barrier to dating in relation to each other. For Blacks this separation has resulted in a lack of interest in interethnic dating. Such reasons as those mentioned above are a consequence of the structure of society, which allocates different status and roles to groups of individuals based on ethnicity. Society thereby separates ethnic groups into barrios or ghettos which breed ignorance, fear and suspicion of other groups. Although there has been some reduction of this in the past two decades, it has certainly not disappeared (Rossides, 1976, pp. 25 l-257). The effects of living in such ethnic enclaves, or colonies, can be seen in the low rates of interethnic friendship and marriage when compared to members of the same groups who live together in mixed neighborhoods, or frontiers (see Moore, 1976, pp. 1 1 l- 118). Slightly more than six out of ten respondents reported having dated interethnically. This is a dramatic increase over the one in five found in a nationwide survey conducted in 1970. However, the earlier survey discovered that among young Americans between the ages of 21-25 years old approximately one in three had dated interethnically (Downs, 1971). Results indicate that most of those who have not dated interethnically would like to do so. The barriers to such behavior are to be found originating more in society than in the individuals themselves. Speaking of intergroup dating, Adams said “if young people were entirely free

Interethnic

Dating

I25

from group constraints, the difficulties posed by interclass, interreligious. and interracial dating would very likely be minimal. Either they would avoid such relationships because they had internalized negative stereotypes concerning the differences represented, or else would engage in heterogeneous dating with no thought of there being problems involved” (1980, p. 213). He goes on to say that “parents or other significant persons, in arguing against heterogeneous dating, may be motivated by a sincere belief that such relations are problem-producing if they culminate in marriage** (1980, p. 213). However, dating serves many functions, including socialization as well as mate selection. Therefore, some of the concerns may be unnecessary. Data from the present study do reveal, however, that half of the respondents have indicated they would consider interethnic marriage. Almost two decades ago Milton Gordon (1964) wrote that the key to total assimilation of the different ethnic groups was structural assimilation. Large-scale intermarriage would be dependent upon close, sustained relationships and common memberships. Nevertheless, as the earlier study cited above (Vreeland, 1972) indicated, most dating is, in fact, for reasons other than mate selection. People actually marry very few of the individuals whom they have dated. Interethnic dating is part of the socialization process and, since results of the present study show that dating someone of another ethnic group is more likely to lead to a positive rather than negative evaluation of the group, in the long run may benefit society as well as the individuals involved.

REFERENCES ADAMS, B.N. The family: A sociological interpretation. Chicago: Rand McNally, 1980. BARRON, M. Intergroup aspects of choosing a mate. In M. Fishbien and J. Fishbien (Eds.), Successful marriage. New York: Doubleday, I97 I. BELL, R. Marriage andfamily interaction. Homewood, IL: Dorsey Press, 1967. BURMA, J. Interethnic marriage in Los Angeles, 1948-1959, Social Forces, 1961, 42, 156-165. DOWNS, J. Black/White dating, Lift 70, May 28, 1971, 56-67. DUBERMAN, L. Marriage and its azternatives. New York: Praeger, 1974. FRANCOEUR, R. AND FRANCOEUR, A. Hot and cool sex: Fidelity in marriage. In R. Libby and R. Whitehurst (Eds.), Marriage and alternatives: ExpcProring intimate relationships. Glenview, IL: Scott, Foresman, 1977. GALLUP, G. Teens accept mixed marriage. San Antonio Express, Thursday, April 13, 1978, p. I-E. GORDON, M. Assimilation in American life. New York: Oxford University Press, 1964. HEER, D.M. The prevalence of Black-White marriage in the United States, 1960 and 1970, Journal of Marriage and the Famif.v, 1974, 36,246-258.

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LAMPE, P.E. Towards amalgamation: interethnic dating among Blacks, Mexican Americans and Anglos. Ethnic Groups, 198 1, 3, 97-109. MERTON, R. Intermarriage and the social structure: facts and theory. Psychiatry, 1941, 4, 361-374.

McLEMORE, S.D. Racial and ethnic relations in America. Boston: Allyn and Bacon, 1980. MOORE, J.W. with H. PACHON. Mexican American. Englewood Cliffs, N.J.: Prentice-Hall, 1976. PETRONI, F. Teenage interracial dating. Transacrion, 1971, 8, 54-59. ROSSIDES, D. The American class sysrem. Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1976. SCHAEFER, R. Racial and ethnic groups. Boston: Little, Brown, 1979. VAN DEN BERGHE, P. Raceandracism. New York:John Wiley and Sons, 1967. VREELAND, R. Is it true what they say about Harvard boys? Psychology Today, 1972. 5, 65-68.

ABSTRACT

TRANSLATIONS

On vient de faire une recherche parmi des colle'giens nzgres, mexico-amgricains et anglo-amgricains pour d&erminer les raisons subjectives pour les quelles on de'cide de s'engager dans les rendezvous interethniques. Les rgsultats indiquent que les raisons pour prendre des rendez-vous avec quelqu' un d'un autre groupe dthnique sont semblables 5 celles des redezCepedant, plusieurs raisons contre de vous intra-ethniques. En tels redez-vous apparaissent 8tre bien diffgrentes. ils semble que les raisons en faveur des rendez-vous g&-&al, inter-groupes peuvent ?tre mieuz expliquEes normativement tandis que celles qui opposent les rendez-vous inter-groupes sont mieuz comprises du point de vue de structure. Se ha llevado a cabo un estudio con el fin de descubrir las razones por las cuales personas deciden a salir o no salir a pasear con miembros de diferentes grupos gtnicos. El estudio utiliz6 estudiantes universitarios que pertenec$an a 10s grupos Negros, Mexico-Americanos y Anglos. Los resultados que se obtuvieron indicaron que son similares a las razones que existen en la decision de salir con una persona de1 mismo grupo &nico a que pertenence, per0 las razones para no salir con personas de diferente grupo Ctnico son muy distintas. En general, resulta que las razones para salir corn0 pareja intergtnica se pueden explicar por las normas sociales que rigen, mientras las razones para no participar en estos paseos se explican mejor por la estructura socral.