- Email: [email protected]
More Than “Just a Nurse”
More Than “Just a Nurse”
i Anne Katz, RN, PhD, is editor of AWHONN Lifelines and an assistant professor in the faculty of nursing at the University of Manitoba in Winnipeg, Manitoba. Write to her at [email protected]
August | September 2004
I completed my doctoral degree four years ago, and since then I have been proud to call myself Dr. Katz. This title is one small way that all the hours in front of the computer, the intellectual agony and numerous crises of confidence are rewarded. However, I have noticed something that causes disquiet. On occasion, when I have been introduced to a stranger as Dr. Katz, I am asked what kind of doctor I am. On more than one occasion, I have heard myself say: “I am just a nurse.” I have thought about that careless response over the years and am pleased to say that I no longer respond that way. Ever. What we do as nurses is not just anything! As nurses, we contribute every day in many different ways to the individuals, families and communities with whom we work. We share our knowledge with other health care professionals, students and the general public. So what’s in it for us? Why do we keep doing what we do?
Working has different meanings for us all. Some nurses go to work to earn a living. They get though each shift, cash their checks and one day they retire. Some of us define ourselves by the work we do and accept new challenges as opportunities to build our resumes that will help us to find better/more challenging positions. Still others go to work each day determined to make a difference, and come home at the end of a shift, inspired and humbled by what we have witnessed as our patients have struggled and triumphed. But I think that there is something else that keeps us in the workplace. I believe that each and every day, we receive gifts of self-knowledge and awareness from the work we do as nurses. I invite you to participate in an exercise that I hope will illuminate
AWHONN Lifelines
293
I believe that each and every day, we receive gifts of selfknowledge and awareness from the work we do as nurses
294
AWHONN Lifelines
some of these gifts and that perhaps will inspire you to see your work in a different light. Think back to your days as a student and remember an encounter with a fellow student, an incident with a professor or clinical teacher. Write this down on a large sheet of paper. Write as fast as you can and try not to edit yourself. No one else is going to see this. When you have completed your description of the incident, read it over and look for the meaning in the story. From that meaning you will find a gift. Perhaps you would rather reflect on an experience when you were a new graduate, with a heart full of hope and fear and prayer that you would remember all the book learning and do no harm! Or perhaps you would like to reflect on what it has been like studying for a graduate degree or certification as an experienced nurse who is once again a student. You can even complete this exercise with an incident that happened this week or last month. Let me share one of my reflections with you. This story comes from the time when I was a senior student nurse working in a medical ward on 12-hour night shifts. I had recently married and was somewhat frustrated at having to work four shifts a week when I could be with my new husband in our new apartment. At the handover, we were told about a patient who was in isolation and who needed special care. This man was 42 years old and had leukemia. His white cell count was very low, and he was “difficult” with a “demanding” wife. One of us students needed to take on his care for the night shift—we all stood there looking at our feet. Even though I wanted an easy assignment this shift and probably for the rest of that placement, I decided to volunteer. I thought that if I volunteered, I would have some feeling of control, rather than being chosen randomly from the group of students. I also knew that if this couple were satisfied with the care that I provided this first night, I would likely be assigned to this patient for the rest of my shifts and this could be a good thing. With my heart beating loudly in my ears, I walked into his room . . . I learned so much from that
patient and his wife. I learned about courage and pain and the deep love that can be found when time is limited and hope is hard to grasp. I learned that it was not my knowledge of the drugs and my handling of his IV but my willingness to ask what they needed and my readiness to bend the rules that meant the most to this couple as they faced what to me was unimaginable. I urge you to try this exercise. Think of it as telling a story for your own benefit. At the very least you will recall people whose intersection with your life caused you to smile or shed a tear or even lose your temper. But on deeper examination, they will have given you a gift and taught you something about yourself or the human condition. As nurses there are many gifts that we enjoy every day. We deal with complex responsibilities that often prepare us to be expert “multitaskers.” We work in a fast-paced environment that is constantly changing; there is little opportunity for boredom. We work with new and exciting technologies but still primarily use our hands and our hearts. We share each day with patients who entrust us with their lives and with colleagues who share our hopes and watch our backs. Each and every day we are challenged to learn something new and put that knowledge to good use. And we get paid for the privilege! We are not and never have been just nurses. We are champions and warriors, care givers and heart keepers. We are brave and we are scared. We are humanity in all its glory and weakness. We are nurses.
Volume 8
Issue 4
i Anne Katz, RN, PhD, is editor of AWHONN Lifelines and an assistant professor in the faculty of nursing at the University of Manitoba in Winnipeg, Manitoba. Write to her at [email protected]
August | September 2004
I completed my doctoral degree four years ago, and since then I have been proud to call myself Dr. Katz. This title is one small way that all the hours in front of the computer, the intellectual agony and numerous crises of confidence are rewarded. However, I have noticed something that causes disquiet. On occasion, when I have been introduced to a stranger as Dr. Katz, I am asked what kind of doctor I am. On more than one occasion, I have heard myself say: “I am just a nurse.” I have thought about that careless response over the years and am pleased to say that I no longer respond that way. Ever. What we do as nurses is not just anything! As nurses, we contribute every day in many different ways to the individuals, families and communities with whom we work. We share our knowledge with other health care professionals, students and the general public. So what’s in it for us? Why do we keep doing what we do?
Working has different meanings for us all. Some nurses go to work to earn a living. They get though each shift, cash their checks and one day they retire. Some of us define ourselves by the work we do and accept new challenges as opportunities to build our resumes that will help us to find better/more challenging positions. Still others go to work each day determined to make a difference, and come home at the end of a shift, inspired and humbled by what we have witnessed as our patients have struggled and triumphed. But I think that there is something else that keeps us in the workplace. I believe that each and every day, we receive gifts of self-knowledge and awareness from the work we do as nurses. I invite you to participate in an exercise that I hope will illuminate
AWHONN Lifelines
293
I believe that each and every day, we receive gifts of selfknowledge and awareness from the work we do as nurses
294
AWHONN Lifelines
some of these gifts and that perhaps will inspire you to see your work in a different light. Think back to your days as a student and remember an encounter with a fellow student, an incident with a professor or clinical teacher. Write this down on a large sheet of paper. Write as fast as you can and try not to edit yourself. No one else is going to see this. When you have completed your description of the incident, read it over and look for the meaning in the story. From that meaning you will find a gift. Perhaps you would rather reflect on an experience when you were a new graduate, with a heart full of hope and fear and prayer that you would remember all the book learning and do no harm! Or perhaps you would like to reflect on what it has been like studying for a graduate degree or certification as an experienced nurse who is once again a student. You can even complete this exercise with an incident that happened this week or last month. Let me share one of my reflections with you. This story comes from the time when I was a senior student nurse working in a medical ward on 12-hour night shifts. I had recently married and was somewhat frustrated at having to work four shifts a week when I could be with my new husband in our new apartment. At the handover, we were told about a patient who was in isolation and who needed special care. This man was 42 years old and had leukemia. His white cell count was very low, and he was “difficult” with a “demanding” wife. One of us students needed to take on his care for the night shift—we all stood there looking at our feet. Even though I wanted an easy assignment this shift and probably for the rest of that placement, I decided to volunteer. I thought that if I volunteered, I would have some feeling of control, rather than being chosen randomly from the group of students. I also knew that if this couple were satisfied with the care that I provided this first night, I would likely be assigned to this patient for the rest of my shifts and this could be a good thing. With my heart beating loudly in my ears, I walked into his room . . . I learned so much from that
patient and his wife. I learned about courage and pain and the deep love that can be found when time is limited and hope is hard to grasp. I learned that it was not my knowledge of the drugs and my handling of his IV but my willingness to ask what they needed and my readiness to bend the rules that meant the most to this couple as they faced what to me was unimaginable. I urge you to try this exercise. Think of it as telling a story for your own benefit. At the very least you will recall people whose intersection with your life caused you to smile or shed a tear or even lose your temper. But on deeper examination, they will have given you a gift and taught you something about yourself or the human condition. As nurses there are many gifts that we enjoy every day. We deal with complex responsibilities that often prepare us to be expert “multitaskers.” We work in a fast-paced environment that is constantly changing; there is little opportunity for boredom. We work with new and exciting technologies but still primarily use our hands and our hearts. We share each day with patients who entrust us with their lives and with colleagues who share our hopes and watch our backs. Each and every day we are challenged to learn something new and put that knowledge to good use. And we get paid for the privilege! We are not and never have been just nurses. We are champions and warriors, care givers and heart keepers. We are brave and we are scared. We are humanity in all its glory and weakness. We are nurses.
Volume 8
Issue 4